As this is my very first blog post, I thought I would talk about my biggest, most recent revelation. Over the last couple of months, I have been asking several questions: Who is God and who am I? I have tried so hard to be a "good, Christian girl", to please God, and to enlighten others to their sinful ways. What did it get me? I could not make myself change into something truly good no matter how hard I tried.
I have been "good" but I knew it was never good enough to please God. Every time I did something wrong, I told myself how horrible I was, that there was no way I could possibly be acceptable to God. He intimidated me. How could a Being as holy as He was, desire to have a relationship with me?
Of course, I knew that God was love and that He was good. But my true belief was what defined my actions. Finally, God began to reveal to me that I was completely accepted by Him. I brought Him pleasure. I was one with Jesus Christ.
Before man's fall, God and man were friends. There was no sin or struggle to talk about, just each other. What they liked, what they thought, what their favorite thing was about the day. That fellowship ended when man sinned. No longer did man desire God; his spirit was in rebellion.
Christ came to restore that relationship. No longer is there a wall between man and God. My relationship with God is exactly how it would have been in the Garden of Eden. I am the desire of His heart. I am acceptable to Him and He is pleased with me no matter what I do.
It is about God Himself, His glory and His praise, not how bad we are. It helps answer the question: "Why did God make man if He knew he was going to sin?" Because it never was about us and our sin; it was always about all things being "to the praise of the glory of His grace"(Eph. 1:6). That was God's purpose and it always has been. He created man so that He could live in and through him and man's fall never altered that purpose.
Jesus came to offer freedom and rest but the Christians I see have neither freedom nor rest. What matters are the externals. If your life does not line up with what they think the Bible(or, in reality, their denomination) says, then you have a problem in your relationship with God. You need to get right with Him, read your Bible and pray more, get involved in more programs, evaluate your priorities, and the list could go on and on. They live bound by rules, always trying harder to follow God and be acceptable in His sight. I used to be one of them.
The reality is that I can't live the life. Jesus is THE LIFE and only He can live His Life. Being a "Christian" simply means being one with Christ, Him living as me. If I am trying my best to live how God expects me to, I am going to exhaust myself and completely fail. My identity is no longer in the external actions and labels but in Christ alone.
